5. Bardon’s Revenge of Fury by David Drake and David Webber - First they blew up his planet, then they blew up his galaxy and then they blew up his starship. But that was their last mistake. Now Jon Bardon, mercenary with a grudge, and former Imperial Commando of the Secret Space Guards is after the Ap’Rij’hit Ra’none and nothing will stand in his way including an alien armada, bounty hunters, a seductive Imperial princess and his ex-wife who is now the Empress or something. Let the fury begin!

4. Applebee’s Elves by Jody Lynn Nye and Sarah A. Hoyt - When Emmie Winston who has believed all her life in elves discovers elves working at her local Applebee’s she is delighted and her 13 cats are even more delighted. But the presence of evil land developers who want to turn the Applebee’s into a nuclear power plant because they hate mother nature is a threat to the discovery of the secret of the elves. Also one of the elves might be a secret prince or something.

3. Russkies of the American Empire by S.M. Stirling - When Mike Barton, forest ranger formerly in the Gulf War, stumbles through an unexplained doorway into an alternate universe where the Russians colonized Russia and turned it into a vast Gulag full of Indians, there’s only one thing for him to do, lead the Indian tribes in a rebellion against their Russky overlords. Also for some reason in this universe fire and friction based weapons doesn’t work requiring Mike to invent an entire technology based on ice.

2. Smash the Space Bastards from Orion! by Eric Flint, John Ringo and Dave Freer - What if dinosaurs ruled the universe except on earth? Also what if they could use magic? Now imagine a dinosaur galactic empire based on magic battling humans in technological starships who are the only race in the galaxy on whom magic doesn’t work. Also imagine that in a last ditch effort to stop humanity the evil space dinosaurs go back in time to the age of the Vikings requiring Captain John Mistletoe USN to ally with the Vikings of the 4th century to destroy the dinosaur space menace once and for all. Also Captain John Mistletoe is blind but he has a really smart psychic seeing eye dog. Imagine that!

1. The Imaginary Brigade by Mercedes Lackey and Lois McMaster Bujold - When the International Space Station explodes sending researcher Diane Crawford back in time to the Age of Atlantis when wizards use magic, she discovers that the most powerful magic of all is love, and also crystals. But will it be enough to save Atlantis from the elves and their fearsome Imaginary Brigade that doesn’t exist? Can Diane go back to the present after discovering her magical abilities? Can you think of a reason for buying this novel? Yes, you’re still only thirteen.