February 9, 2009

What do you get when you cross a Dinosaur and a Sheep?

Filed under: Uncategorized, Comedy

Apparently you get Gorgo, the Monster from the Sea.

I don’t know about you but Gorgo’s heart doesn’t really seem to be in it. The dinosaur part of him is slavering, but the sheep part of him just wants to do some grazing. That’s just what happens when you cross a dinosaur and a sheep. The dinosaur part of him wants to smash people in revenge for portraying his species as a bunch of happy go lucky purple pals who dance and sing to raise money for PBS, while the sheep part of him just wants to graze in a green field, while making ironic observations about UFO’s. This of course leaves Gorgo torn between two worlds, and two destinies. On the other hand being burned with a flamethower has yet to put anyone in a good mood.

But it figures that Japan would get the cool monsters, while any monster that attacks the UK has to have a horrid but unmistakable resemblance to Prince Charles. Even British monsters can’t help being inbred and sardonic, while of course boasting truly terrible teeth. There’s no help for it but for the UK to fall back on American and Japanese monster imports. Not if the scariest thing they can come up with is a reptilian thirty meter Prince Charles, which I’ll grant you is fairly scary indeed on a day to day basis, but just doesn’t cause people to flee for the hills or bring out the flame throwers. Though maybe it should.

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